Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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