after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
