why didn't you poke me back
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize