Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
