Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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