i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize