i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
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