...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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