talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
