Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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