Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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