nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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