But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize