I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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