Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
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