I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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