OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Randomize
