ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
