I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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