So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
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It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
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My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
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