i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
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