I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
