I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
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