i think i have herpe
just one?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
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