Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
