i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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