with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
