Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
you will always have a special place in my vag
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize