Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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