Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Sober January is a disaster.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize