guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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