no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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