Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Randomize
