how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
