Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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