Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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