Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Randomize
