Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
