you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Randomize
