You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
