I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
