I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
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i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
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no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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