playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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