i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null