Texts From Last Night

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  (209): View more from California

  HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????

  (606): View more from Kentucky

  We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.

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  (209): HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24????? (606 ): We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour. http://tfl.nu/y88k
  Replies (30) Good night (3358) Bad night (599)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?

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  (843): did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity? http://tfl.nu/ve53
  Replies (21) Good night (2415) Bad night (721) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask

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  (610): you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask http://tfl.nu/pl36
  Replies (31) Good night (9699) Bad night (728) Order T-Shirt
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.

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  (902): I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night. http://tfl.nu/vppz
  Replies (13) Good night (5798) Bad night (886) Order T-Shirt
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."

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  (301): let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child." http://tfl.nu/sqg2
  Replies (18) Good night (5442) Bad night (2564) Order T-Shirt
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.

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  (704): he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen. http://tfl.nu/oi0t
  Replies (26) Good night (8926) Bad night (1014) Order T-Shirt
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night

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  (314): I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night http://tfl.nu/ebah
  Replies (6) Good night (2304) Bad night (861) Order T-Shirt
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples

  (1-732): View more from New Jersey

  you dont

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  i dont

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  (732): shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples (1-732): you dont (732): i dont http://tfl.nu/v78w
  Replies (7) Good night (4566) Bad night (1013)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...

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  (248): im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend... http://tfl.nu/rj6y
  Replies (4) Good night (2303) Bad night (1009) Order T-Shirt
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  we should probably just go check in at the police station right now

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  (814): we should probably just go check in at the police station right now http://tfl.nu/dhxr
  Replies (8) Good night (1387) Bad night (563) Order T-Shirt
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  (607): View more from New York

  Did strip banana grams actually happen last night

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  (607): Did strip banana grams actually happen last night http://tfl.nu/pz66
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun

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  (614): I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun http://tfl.nu/01eg
  Replies (14) Good night (1202) Bad night (892) Order T-Shirt
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure

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  (703): We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure http://tfl.nu/ow8j
  Replies (4) Good night (1195) Bad night (362) Order T-Shirt
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  (904): View more from Florida

  Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.

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  (904): Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN. http://tfl.nu/2f4k
  Replies (3) Good night (683) Bad night (223) Order T-Shirt
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  (325): View more from Texas

  So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.

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  (325): So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it. http://tfl.nu/zi6y
  Replies (6) Good night (975) Bad night (231) Order T-Shirt

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