kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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