If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
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