Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Randomize
