Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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