I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Randomize
