dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
