I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Randomize
