I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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