Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
